If you haven’t read “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen Covey, I suggest you put it at or near the top of your to-do list (right after enabling world peace and watching 24 consecutive hours of ’24’). If not for the life lessons, then at least so you can put into practice what you have long known in your gut to be true: “if you want to achieve… [you must] identify and apply the principle or natural law that governs the results you seek.”
Because, as obvious as those words may seem, many of us (myself included) are guilty of addressing our most fundamental challenges with short-term, short-sighted fixes consistent with today’s increasingly “on-the-go” society – instead of seeking lasting solutions based upon timeless principles.
To illustrate this dichotomy, here are some examples from Covey’s book that I found particularly relevant:
“What’s in it for me?”: “Our culture teaches us that if we want something in life, we have to ‘look out for number one.’ It says, ‘Life is a game, a race, a competition, and you better win it.’ Schoolmates, work colleagues, even family members are seen as competitors – the more they win, the less there is for you. Of course we try to appear generous and cheer for others’ successes, but inwardly, privately, so many of us are eating our hearts out when others achieve. Many of the great things in history of our civilization have been achieved by the independent will of a determined soul. But the greatest opportunities and boundless accomplishments …are reserved for those who master the art of ‘we.’ True greatness will be achieved through the abundant mind that works selflessly – with mutual respect, for mutual benefit.”
Blame and Victimism: “Wherever you find a problem, you will usually find the finger-pointing of blame. Society is addicted to playing the victim. ‘If only my boss wasn’t such a controlling idiot…If only I lived in a better place…If only I hadn’t been so poor…If only…If only.’ Blaming everyone and everything else for our problems and challenges may be the norm and may provide temporary relief from the pain, but it also chains us to these very problems. Show me someone who is humble enough to accept and take responsibility for his or her circumstances…and I’ll show you the supreme power of choice.”
Lack of life Balance: “Life in our cell phone society is increasingly complex, demanding, stressful, and exhausting. For all our efforts to manage our time, do more, be more, and achieve greater efficiency through the wonders of modern technology, why is it we increasingly find ourselves in the ‘thick of things’ – subordinating our health, family, integrity, and many of the things that matter most to our work? The problem is that our modern culture says, ‘go in earlier, stay later, be more efficient, live with the sacrifice for now – but the truth is that balance and peace of mind are not produced by these things; they follow the person who develops a clear sense of his or her highest priorities and who lives with focus and integrity towards them.”
Conflict and Differences: “Society’s competitive approach to resolving the conflict and differences tends to center on ‘winning as much as you can.’ Though much good has come from the skillful art of compromise, where both sides give on their positions until an acceptable middle point is reached, neither side ends up truly pleased. What a waste to have differences drive people to the lowest common denominator between them! What a waste to fail to unleash the principle of constructive cooperation in developing solutions to problems that are better than either party’s original notion!”
Think about that.
I am. Therefore I dream. 